TV Showdown: TEEN WOLF and NINE LIVES OF CHLOE KING

This summer two teen-centric series premiered on television: Teen Wolf, which is a remake of a movie I've never seen; and The Nine Lives of Chloe King, which is based on a book and has a very long title.

Both shows are cheesy but good for some "lite" entertainment. But which one is better? Compare and contrast time, kids! Behold, I give you this spreadsheet that took me way longer to put together than if I'd just written a paragraph:

. Protagonists . Teen Wolf Nine Lives of Chloe King (hereafter known as NLoCK) . Scott McCall Personality: doofus Chloe King Personality: bubbly . Age: 16 Age: 16 . Extracurricular activities: lacrosse Extracurricular activities: trying on clothes . Job: vet assistant Job: clerk in 2nd-hand clothing boutique . Favorite superhero reference: The Hulk Favorite superhero reference: none . Parents: Mom crazy busy; dad mysteriously absent Parents: Adopted; mom crazy busy, dad mysteriously absent . Happy he got superpowers because: he can now play lacrosse Happy she got superpowers because: she's attractive to the men-folk . Sad he got superpowers because: he's even more of weirdo now than he was before. Sad she got superpowers because: she can't hang with her friends constantly . Best Friends . Teen Wolf NLoCK . Stiles Personality: adorkable Amy Personality: Sassy bitch . Brings to the table: a car, research skills, brains, comic relief Brings to the table: a car, the cold hard truth . Worried about: being eaten Worried about: losing her bestie . Jealousy meter: low Jealousy meter: high . Paul Personality: lost puppy . Brings to the table: superhero knowledge, emotional support for Amy . Worried about: not being a sidekick . Jealousy meter: medium

. Love Interests . Teen Wolf NLoCK . Allison Attractive because: She's new at school, so has no idea what an idiot Scott is Brian Attractive because: Is in college . Sexual aggression meter: high Sexual aggression meter: just this side of gay best friend . Romeo and Juliet element: dad is a werewolf hunter Romeo and Juliet element: dad heads organization trying to wipe out people like Chloe . Convenient plot device: soothes the savage beast Convenient plot device: has a car . Special Powers . Teen Wolf NLoCK . Better vision check Better vision oh heck yes . Stronger double-check Stronger yes . Faster check Faster yup . Super hearing check Super hearing yes . Shape shifting check Shape shifting has yet to grow a tail and whiskers . Empathic no Empathic yes . Immortal no Immortal kinda; has 9 lives instead of 1 . Miscellaneous Plot Elements . Teen Wolf NLoCK . Sensei Derek, lives in crappy house and is grumpy Sensei Valentina, lives in kick-ass apartment and is super-understanding . Location NorCal Location San Francisco . Things this teenager does that teenagers would never do Accept punishment gracefully Things this teenager does that teenagers would never do Dinner party with friends every Wednesday

. Pressure to conform? An alpha will kill him unless he joins a pack Pressure to conform? Chloe must train to become leader of the Mai, an ancient race of cat people. . School Antagonist Jackson, captain of the lacrosse team School Antagonist Alek's girlfriend . Superhero Antagonist The werewolf hunters Superhero Antagonist An evil organization dedicated to wiping out the Mai . Uses powers for personal gain? Uses super strength and speed in lacrosse Uses powers for personal gain? Listens to friends' conversations when they think she can't hear

As you can see, these shows are pretty similar, but NLoCK is more feel-goody and lighter on the dramaz. I would also say Teen Wolf is slightly better-written than NLoCK.

What interests me about both shows is how both kids seem to have sexuality tied to their supernatural abilities. This is especially true for Chloe, who starts attracting boys the way a Coyote Ugly waitress attracts barflies as soon as she turns sixteen--and comes into her Mai abilities on the same day. Coincidence? I don't think so. Scott also magically starts dating only after he's been bitten by a werewolf.

Both shows are über-silly and great for a light brain break. And while I do think Teen Wolf is better-scripted and -produced, there's something about NLoCK that keeps me from hating it, despite the fact that I start grinding my teeth every time I see Chloe's Pier1-sponsored bedroom or her and her mom have a ridiculous heart-to-heart. It's still better than The Vampire Diaries, anyway.

Is anyone else enjoying these shows despite themselves?